So, in case ya haven't heard the world is going to end tomorrow....Sooo what to do? I am once again at work fucking around instead of doing paperwork and I'm feeling just plain down. If the world ends tomorrow I don't want it to be like this...
So ( I'm saying so a lot) it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood or at least it looks like it is outside...
I think I need to get out of the mental health field or at least long term care before I myself go crazy!!! And, ya know whats very unfortunate? It's not my clients (so much) its the buildings and the agency that I work for that drives me crazy...They all seem to operate on these rules, rules which are not explained to anyone ahead of time but they are still expected to be followed...
I guess that was something I learned how to cope with in college thanks to Professor Erikson...He'd do that crap ALL the time. Random bonus points and quizzes and papers etc...imagine if you will the WORST professor that you have ever had and times that by like I donno 100 and you'll get Professor Erikson (jerk).
Anyway....I just feel blah and I don't want it all to end that way...if the world ends tomorrow....
Friday, May 20, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Been a long time....
I know I said that I would keep up with this but I also believe that I said that I am queen at procrastinating. SOOO a lot has happened since my last post....I got a new job, making decent money but yeah it's still not too much. My bf Gwen is now engaged to one of my husbands really good friends Dave. Too happy for them ...BUT (here it comes) they have NO clue!!! Mind you I didn't have a clue really either BUT they have such an unrealistic expectation of like EVERYTHING...Well Gwen does but I think I have covered her crazy....Oh well I think they will be ok.
Moving on....I was just doing some Google stalking andd I found by little sisters 2 blogs....WEELLLL I found out that her boyfriend is an ex drug addict and has some issues...I also found out that my sister at one point thought that she had an STD...WHAT THE HELL!!! Who knows maybe she does maybe she doesn't. I had a short period in my life where I was an absolute idiot (not to say that I don't backslide sometimes) but comeon!!! Grace (my sister) is a dumbass she flippin used her real name for her blog with no security NOTHING!!! So yeah needless to say I added these said blogs to my favorites....
I think I'm kinda creepy but you'll have that. I also added her blogs to my favorites because she never calls me. I would like to know what I did or my parents did to her? Grace did not have the decency to call my mom on mothers day. Dad and I were very very pissed off. All my sweet mom wanted to know was that she was ok and to tell her that she loved her...my sister is such a dumbass.
So I'm here working "overtime" and using the company's computer to post this. I'm more fearful of this company and always have a continual anxious feeling that I am going to lose my job. Oh well at least I feel that I am doing my job and now I no longer have to put up with Farmville queen...YAY!
So other than the above not much has changed. I've lost a few pounds, thanks to Zumba and dieting. But I'm boring and like my life...so until next time!!!-Jill
Moving on....I was just doing some Google stalking andd I found by little sisters 2 blogs....WEELLLL I found out that her boyfriend is an ex drug addict and has some issues...I also found out that my sister at one point thought that she had an STD...WHAT THE HELL!!! Who knows maybe she does maybe she doesn't. I had a short period in my life where I was an absolute idiot (not to say that I don't backslide sometimes) but comeon!!! Grace (my sister) is a dumbass she flippin used her real name for her blog with no security NOTHING!!! So yeah needless to say I added these said blogs to my favorites....
I think I'm kinda creepy but you'll have that. I also added her blogs to my favorites because she never calls me. I would like to know what I did or my parents did to her? Grace did not have the decency to call my mom on mothers day. Dad and I were very very pissed off. All my sweet mom wanted to know was that she was ok and to tell her that she loved her...my sister is such a dumbass.
So I'm here working "overtime" and using the company's computer to post this. I'm more fearful of this company and always have a continual anxious feeling that I am going to lose my job. Oh well at least I feel that I am doing my job and now I no longer have to put up with Farmville queen...YAY!
So other than the above not much has changed. I've lost a few pounds, thanks to Zumba and dieting. But I'm boring and like my life...so until next time!!!-Jill
Saturday, October 23, 2010
2ed time...a brief overview
So it's not even noon on a Saturday and I have managed to lock myself out of my house and set the security alarm off at my office. Pretty awesome I must say. So I'm here "working" when in reality I have nothing to do. I was sick this week and I have to make time up.... It is what is is, I just really hate being board.
Last night
I'm 23 and my free time with my friends consists of game nights, movie nights, watching some sort of sporting events etc. I used to be the hardest partyier around but thank GOD I woke up one day and quit.
So, me and my husband, and another couple where hanging out when my best friend, we'll call her Gwen tells me about one of our mutual friends, we'll call her Vi....Vi is a compulsive lair, storyteller, what have ya. She's ALWAYS sick, ALWAYS. I mean yes she has had some experiences in her life that most people don't have but COME ON!!! So, last night my friend Gwen received a text from Vi. Vi was in the hospital with a list of ailments including "difficultly breathing at times". Yeah Ok....what Vi did, she went to WebMD and found the symptoms for said ailment ( last night it was pneumonia). I mean Vi texted Gwen the symptom's list. Ridiculous!!
Background on Vi
I met Vi when I was a sophomore in high school. We hit it off as friends pretty quickly. Vi was the only one of my friends from high school to see right through the facade that my high school boyfriend put on for everyone. So when I broke up with Lee, Vi was the only one that I was friends with at the time to remain my friend. Vi and I hung out a lot between the end of my senior year to the end of my sophomore year of college. Then I transferred. This is that part that doesn't make too much since to me. I was going to a college 50 minutes from my hometown, when I transferred I was going to a college 30ish minutes from my hometown. After I transferred I helped Vi gain entrance into the college that I was attending. Vi had some difficultly in high school and obtained her GED. Therefore, she thought that she could not "do" college. She treid and tried very hard at first. But, Vi gives up very quickly and by the end of her first semester she was talking about dropping out. Needless to say she dropped out before midterms of her seconed semester. I had a lot of people ask me what happoned and why? Vi felt she couldn't cut it, wasn't worthy, whatever. Well Vi set herself up for failure. She brings a lot of what happons to her on herself.
During this time Vi was going through her college experience, I was branching out, if you will. I auditioned for the college's show choir "AC". The audition process was very hard and very few people make it through. By the Grace of God I did. At the time I was the only person in the group that wasn't a music major. I was Vi's only close friend at the time and she made sure that I knew that. Also, at the time I was working two on campus jobs, and waiting tables. I was busy, and I started to have other friends, interests, etc. apart form Vi. We stopped talking as frequently, there was never an argument we just went in different directions.
During this time I met Gwen.
Gwen...let me tell ya..We are sisters separated at birth! Gwen and I were both Social Work majors and the only smokers in two of the classes that we were taking...the rest is history.
For almost three years Gwen and I developed a friendship that evolved into best friend status. Vi meanwhile started caring for her nieces and I moved in with my then boyfriend now husband Eric. sometime in that three year period Eric proposed to me. Gwen was one of the first people that we called. Vi found out on facebook....I know very bicthy of me.
Two years later.... Eric and I were planning our wedding and I am deciding my bridal party. At that time I had not spoken consistently with Vi for almost 2 years....
Gwen was one of my bridesmaids, Vi was not (I suck I know)
Vi and Gwen had not met until my bridal shower. They didn't get to start to know each other until my bachlorette party. THEN I had the wise idea to ask Gwen's mom Donna if she would drive Vi down to my wedding.
I got married in the smoky mountians.
Vi, Gwen, myself and Donna shared a car/hotel for my wedding. Vi got a little intimate with Gwen...wanted to share a bed with Gwen, very touchy, mouth breather type of stuff. Gwen noticed but was/is too damn nice to say anything mean.
I have been married for almost a year. Vi had stalked Gwen, made stuff up to get Gwen's attention...crazyness, since I got married.
I told Vi that she needs to get some form of therapy for her mental illnesses/ compulsive lying. She also needs to come to grips with her sexual identity. I will be there for Vi every step of the way once she is ready.
The thing that really bothers me is that she has NO since of personal space NONE!! Most people have a "bubble" Vi is literally right on top of you. Do you remember the kid from Hey Arnold? The one that followed the girl that liked Arnold around? THATS VI!!! URG!
So there ya go...I wish I could give my friend Gwen a set of balls to tell Vi to back off...at least just a little bit.
Last night
I'm 23 and my free time with my friends consists of game nights, movie nights, watching some sort of sporting events etc. I used to be the hardest partyier around but thank GOD I woke up one day and quit.
So, me and my husband, and another couple where hanging out when my best friend, we'll call her Gwen tells me about one of our mutual friends, we'll call her Vi....Vi is a compulsive lair, storyteller, what have ya. She's ALWAYS sick, ALWAYS. I mean yes she has had some experiences in her life that most people don't have but COME ON!!! So, last night my friend Gwen received a text from Vi. Vi was in the hospital with a list of ailments including "difficultly breathing at times". Yeah Ok....what Vi did, she went to WebMD and found the symptoms for said ailment ( last night it was pneumonia). I mean Vi texted Gwen the symptom's list. Ridiculous!!
Background on Vi
I met Vi when I was a sophomore in high school. We hit it off as friends pretty quickly. Vi was the only one of my friends from high school to see right through the facade that my high school boyfriend put on for everyone. So when I broke up with Lee, Vi was the only one that I was friends with at the time to remain my friend. Vi and I hung out a lot between the end of my senior year to the end of my sophomore year of college. Then I transferred. This is that part that doesn't make too much since to me. I was going to a college 50 minutes from my hometown, when I transferred I was going to a college 30ish minutes from my hometown. After I transferred I helped Vi gain entrance into the college that I was attending. Vi had some difficultly in high school and obtained her GED. Therefore, she thought that she could not "do" college. She treid and tried very hard at first. But, Vi gives up very quickly and by the end of her first semester she was talking about dropping out. Needless to say she dropped out before midterms of her seconed semester. I had a lot of people ask me what happoned and why? Vi felt she couldn't cut it, wasn't worthy, whatever. Well Vi set herself up for failure. She brings a lot of what happons to her on herself.
During this time Vi was going through her college experience, I was branching out, if you will. I auditioned for the college's show choir "AC". The audition process was very hard and very few people make it through. By the Grace of God I did. At the time I was the only person in the group that wasn't a music major. I was Vi's only close friend at the time and she made sure that I knew that. Also, at the time I was working two on campus jobs, and waiting tables. I was busy, and I started to have other friends, interests, etc. apart form Vi. We stopped talking as frequently, there was never an argument we just went in different directions.
During this time I met Gwen.
Gwen...let me tell ya..We are sisters separated at birth! Gwen and I were both Social Work majors and the only smokers in two of the classes that we were taking...the rest is history.
For almost three years Gwen and I developed a friendship that evolved into best friend status. Vi meanwhile started caring for her nieces and I moved in with my then boyfriend now husband Eric. sometime in that three year period Eric proposed to me. Gwen was one of the first people that we called. Vi found out on facebook....I know very bicthy of me.
Two years later.... Eric and I were planning our wedding and I am deciding my bridal party. At that time I had not spoken consistently with Vi for almost 2 years....
Gwen was one of my bridesmaids, Vi was not (I suck I know)
Vi and Gwen had not met until my bridal shower. They didn't get to start to know each other until my bachlorette party. THEN I had the wise idea to ask Gwen's mom Donna if she would drive Vi down to my wedding.
I got married in the smoky mountians.
Vi, Gwen, myself and Donna shared a car/hotel for my wedding. Vi got a little intimate with Gwen...wanted to share a bed with Gwen, very touchy, mouth breather type of stuff. Gwen noticed but was/is too damn nice to say anything mean.
I have been married for almost a year. Vi had stalked Gwen, made stuff up to get Gwen's attention...crazyness, since I got married.
I told Vi that she needs to get some form of therapy for her mental illnesses/ compulsive lying. She also needs to come to grips with her sexual identity. I will be there for Vi every step of the way once she is ready.
The thing that really bothers me is that she has NO since of personal space NONE!! Most people have a "bubble" Vi is literally right on top of you. Do you remember the kid from Hey Arnold? The one that followed the girl that liked Arnold around? THATS VI!!! URG!
So there ya go...I wish I could give my friend Gwen a set of balls to tell Vi to back off...at least just a little bit.
Friday, October 22, 2010
My first
This is my first post on my first blog....I know, what day and age do I live in? Anywoo, let me get to the point. I named the title of this blog my first and it made me think about the first time that I had sex. Yeah...I thought at the time I was sooo in love with this douchebag but it later turned out that he was sleeping with my best friend. And yes I realize that occurred over five years ago but how does one get over that? My friends, family and husband all seem to think that I am this incerdably strong person. HA! They have NO clue what the hell goes on in my fucked up brain! I feel that I have to keep up this facade of being "strong" and "independent" when really I'm miserable.
Maybe I'm just a tad bi-polar...maybe.
As I mentioned in my profile I just graduated from college. So now is the time for transition and a happy period in my life...ok...Who said that was supposed to be the case? I mean I'm happy but I'm really board with my life. I went from being a full time student, with a full time internship AND a full time job, to just having a full time job.
So I should have a social life right...
Well let me tell ya....My husband works two jobs and I have no kids. My friends are either still in college or have boyfriends with whom they like spending time or they have moved off to a far off land. So basically I feel that I am alone in my own little special Jill world.
But still you should have things to do in your free time....yeah...ok come to the very secluded rural Ohio County that I live in and tell me if there is anything to do besides doing drugs, drinking, and/or having sex with strange. There was once a time when I did such things but no longer. I have a license and a "reputation" that I need to maintain and here in rural Ohio everyone knows everyone's business.
So what do you do??!! Zumba...sleep..read...work...poop, thats pretty much it. TV is ok but there is usually only crap on so I don't bother. So til next time...
Maybe I'm just a tad bi-polar...maybe.
As I mentioned in my profile I just graduated from college. So now is the time for transition and a happy period in my life...ok...Who said that was supposed to be the case? I mean I'm happy but I'm really board with my life. I went from being a full time student, with a full time internship AND a full time job, to just having a full time job.
So I should have a social life right...
Well let me tell ya....My husband works two jobs and I have no kids. My friends are either still in college or have boyfriends with whom they like spending time or they have moved off to a far off land. So basically I feel that I am alone in my own little special Jill world.
But still you should have things to do in your free time....yeah...ok come to the very secluded rural Ohio County that I live in and tell me if there is anything to do besides doing drugs, drinking, and/or having sex with strange. There was once a time when I did such things but no longer. I have a license and a "reputation" that I need to maintain and here in rural Ohio everyone knows everyone's business.
So what do you do??!! Zumba...sleep..read...work...poop, thats pretty much it. TV is ok but there is usually only crap on so I don't bother. So til next time...
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